Having researched the best time of year to plant trees from the endless supply of UK gardening books in my possession, I had my list of trees to try and source locally.

The romantic dream of an orange and lemon grove with  the scent of orange blossom filling the air and looking forward to the abundant supply of freshly squeezed juice and marmalades as the harvest came in made me smile.

Within minutes my dream was shattered – The nice chap ‘Jesus’ at the agricultural centre told me ‘No! Oranges and Lemons are no good – best are Apple, Pear and Cherry’. What about peach? ‘No! too cold’ he replied. OK, I will have Apple, Pear and Cherry. ‘No’! came his response. Why? I asked.  ‘Plant January and February when cold’. ‘But won’t it be too cold’ I asked (being 3000ft above sea level and temperatures dipping to minus 14C in the winter and ground like concrete). ‘No – it is better’ he replied.

Disappointed but thankful to Jesus that I hadn’t made an expensive mistake, I came away with a diary note to return in a few months time and to rethink the now ‘orchard’.